Okay, okay...I'm back (finally!) with the directions on how to finish those lovely little rounds of fungi. Let's recap (ha! Get it? 'Cause mushrooms lids are also called "caps?" Sadly yes, -- this really is the way my mind works) what we have so far:
Mama Lynn's Spinach Stuffed Mushrooms
40 oz package fresh Button Cap Mushrooms (the large blue container)
1 stick or 1/4 lb lightly salted butter
1 small Sweet Vidala onion or other sweet variety
3 cloves fresh garlic
1/3 lb Jimmy Dean Hot Italian Sausage
1 sleeve Ritz crackers
1/4 cup Parmesan Cheese
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce
1 Stouffer's Spinach Souffle (in the frozen section at the grocery store with the Lean Cuisines and other diet meals)
pepper
paprika
dash of Tabasco
The very first thing you want to do is preheat your oven to 400 degrees.
The next first thing you want to do is take those luscious bulbs of heaven and clean them, then snap out the stems and set the stems aside in a bowl...you're gonna need them shortly. After you've gotten your mushrooms all clean and free from cow dung, place them in a 18 x 13 standard jelly roll pan. This next step is soooooo much easier if you have a food processor. If not, you can still get the job done, just give yourself a smidge more prep time. You'll now wanna take the stems and toss them in the processor or mince them by hand, peel your onion and cut it into quarters, then toss it into the Cuisinart (or again, mince by hand), and peel those perfect cloves of garlic, and toss into the mix (or mince by hand, yet again). Pulse all these guys together for about a minute until it looks pretty much like liquid mush (or little bitty snips if you're Cuisinart deprived). Now, take a standard saute pan and melt the butter in the pan on medium heat...when it starts to sizzle, toss in the mushy stuff. You want to cook the mixture and basically reduce as much of the liquid from it as possible, being careful not to burn it or it'll turn bitter due to the garlic -- it should be a beautiful amber color. When you get that hue, place this mixture into a large mixing bowl. Now, take that same saute pan and brown the sausage (about 8 minutes) in it. Attempt to separate the sausage into an even, granular texture as much as possible. Once it's cooked, let it drain on a paper towels and if you've got the "Big Cuis" you can toss the cooked sausage in there for a few pulses just to get the texture really even -- if not, you're certainly welcome to mince it by hand. Now place your sausage into the mixing bowl with the mushroom goop. Next, you'll want to place the Ritz crackers, the Parmesan, and all the dry spices into the Cuisinart (or a large plastic baggy and heavy rolling pin) and pulse or crush until you have a bread crumb looking substance. Add this group of buddies to the mixture in the large bowl. You can dump in the Worcestershire and the Tabasco at this point, too. Now, here comes the most complicated portion of the recipe: cooking the frozen souffle. The key is to cook the souffle to the right texture. And here's the biggest hint -- it's not suppose to look ANYTHING like it does on the box. What we're going for is something between a watery mess and a firm souffle. First, you'll want to take the souffle out of the box and remove the thin plastic film that covers it. Now, leave the souffle in the black plastic container that's been its home for the past few months and place it on a microwavable plate. Next, put the plate in the microwave and zap it for about 3 -5 minutes depending on the setting of your microwave. Take it out and with a regular ol' fork, sort of toss and mix it around in the black container. At this stage it should be partially cooked, a little watery, and possibly still kinda frozen -- this is a good thing -- exactly you want you want! Now, place it back in the micro and hit it for another 3 - 5 minutes. At this point, it should be firming up nicely. Now it's perfect. Throw it into the bowl with the rest of the gang. (If it's still too runny, cook it for 2 minutes at a time, stirring with your fork in between zaps until it firms up.) Incorporate the entire mixture until it resembles an even...well... uhm...brownish, greenie, mossy color. I promise, it'll taste a million times better than it looks. Now, take a small spoon and fill those mushroom caps as much or as little as you wanna, placing them back in the jelly roll pan when they're stuffed. Pop those little suckers in the oven for about 15-20 minutes to heat them thoroughly and cook the mushrooms. They should be nice slightly browned and nice and steamy. At this point, you can top them with shredded cheddar cheese, a tad more Parmesan, or if you really wanna go to town (my personal favorite) velvety Hollandaise decadence. It's ridiculous how fabulous this combination is. Seriously. For real. That's it! Now sit back and revel in how fabulous they are. Oh, but one word of caution -- let the 'shrooms cool off a bit before you bite into one or you'll blister and peel the skin off the roof of your mouth and ruin the whole sublime experience. Enjoy!
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